As the years go by, I started having some Growth Mindset Moments. Over the last 7 years, I went into content phase, I told myself I had it all and that my life was good just the way it was. The only problem was that I forgot to focus on me, because I was focusing on everyone else. This mindset caused me to experience depression, due to the lack of self care and self love.
As a mother and wife it is easy to focus on our family first and put ourselves last. We as women grow up with the mentality and expectation to multitask and be our family superheroes. But the question I have for us is; who is supposed to be our superhero? Who is supposed to take care of us? And who insure all our needs are being met?
I asked these questions because over the last 19 years I was focusing on building my career and insuring that my family had it all and making sure that all their needs were met to the best of my ability. This mindset became me and this was my way of functioning.
Due to this superhero mentality, I wasn’t allowing myself to celebrate me, even though I have accomplished so much over the years. I was giving everyone around me more attention than I was giving myself; I forgot that I needed celebration as well.
I didn’t want anyone to make a big deal over me or my achievements; I even stopped celebrating my birthday 10 years ago, because I was focusing on everyone else’s. I was going above and beyond for the people that was in my circle and refused to receive the same kind of treatment.
About a year ago I find myself very unhappy internally and I couldn’t understand why, because I was surrounded by wonderful people both at home and work. My environments were very health and I was living the dream life many women wish they had. In my mind I had it all; a beautiful family, a job that I love and good friends. For the first time in my life I couldn’t move forward and I didn’t understand why, so I sought professional help.
My Growth Mindset Moment commence when I learned that I was a people pleaser and that I didn’t know how to receive. I also learned that I wasn’t able to please anyone but myself and the only one that could make me jolly was me. Over the years I was attentive to everyone’s happiness to the point where I forgot how to be blissful.
In life, we work so hard to satisfy the ones we love and it never seems good enough, this on the other hand causes us to lose a bit of ourselves, and sometimes we feel as if we are not enough. This stage of my life helps me to realize that I am not able to make anyone happy, because happiness comes from within. Our love ones need to find happiness within them first, before they can truly appreciate you the way you are.
It’s vital for us to comprehend that the only person that could make you happy, is you. The time to start celebrating you; is now. We need to stop putting ourselves last and start focusing on what makes us happy. We are useless to everyone, if we don’t work on altering how we love ourselves and resetting our mindset.